Useless superheroes

Added: Tazia Franqui - Date: 29.11.2021 04:26 - Views: 10804 - Clicks: 7150

In comics, there are universes full of characters who are able to move faster than a speeding bullet, control the elements, easily lift entire buildings and freaking fly. Some of these characters might make you wonder what the creators were thinking, while others reek of attempts at trendiness that just missed the mark. A good deal of them are too ludicrous to even begin to take seriously, useless superheroes still others could be likable With that in mind, come along with us as we "celebrate" 15 of the Most Useless Superheroes ever, presented here in order of least to most useless.

We want to like Jubilee so desperately that it almost pains us to include her on this list. Along with that, it's also hard not to love her yellow-trench-coat-and-pink-shirt combo in a painfully nostalgic way, totally un-ironic way. At the very base of things, her powers are plain lackluster, especially compared to the rest of the X-Men around her. Immortal is the leader and founder of the aforementioned Great Lakes Avengers. Immortal real name: Craig Hollis is a mutant from Sheboygan, Wisconsin whose main power is that he cannot die.

He discovers this skill after several suicide attempts and eventually decides to make some good of it, flinging himself into danger without fear. Di-nah Soar. Ha ha?

Regardless of this one weakness, being un-killable is a pretty cool power -- works for Deadpool, right? Immortal doesn;t have the skills to do anything with it, and instead is content with being a glorified and surly punching bag. Doorman is a guy who can use his body to make a door The main problem? He can only teleport things to the very next room. Heroes who possess more effective teleportation skills, 2. Super-strong heroes who could just blast through walls, and 3.

Super-logical people who could just pick locks and walk through the stupid doors. If you were trapped in a prison with an unpickable lock, needed to break into somewhere without being detected or were completely walled-in someplace, Doorman might be the one to call. Still, it's not enough to kick anyone up to the level of legitimate superhero just because he or she can replicate the abilities of a largely-inanimate object.

Douglas Aaron Ramsey, or Cypher, is a guy who is really good at languages. That may sound flippant because it isbut in truth, these languages include all of those on earth including computer languages and those of a more extraterrestrial bent. Now, barring that last bit, Cypher's abilities are skills that a regular ol' human could feasibly acquire with some practice and maybe an above-average useless superheroes.

His whole deal, however, is understanding language intuitively, instantly and fluently, all on a subconscious level, without expending much of any effort. Cypher did, however, help the New Mutants communicate with and befriend the Technarch alien, Warlockwhen he first arrived on Earth. That's impressive in its own way, but computer hacking and translation skills do not a cool superhero make. She was also a great roller skater noticing a theme? Perhaps, the character should get a pass because she spent so much time being patently against the idea of being a superhero, even as she traipsed around with groups like the X-Men and Gladiators.

She just wanted to be a singer and, briefly, an actressbut villains kept interfering. Gin Genie a. Beckah Parker was a member of X-Statixa group of mutant superheroes who were more preoccupied with becoming rich and famous than doing anything altruistic like saving the world. She could only do so when she is very, very drunk.

The force of her seismic blasts was actually concurrent with her blood-alcohol content. When she was drunk, Gin Genie occasionally aimed her seismic waves at her fellow X-Statix team members, meaning she was often more of a liability than an asset. Her career as a superhero was cut short when she died while on a mission. Born on the planet Lupra, Ulu Vakk got his powers when he was hit by a beam of colorful light from another dimension while working in a science lab. The accident imbued him with the ability to change the color of any object, no matter how big or small.

Thus, he became known as Color Kid. Useless superheroes, Color Kid did manage to make the most out of his pretty useless skill. His color-change abilities not only changed the hue of an object but, on at least one occasion, were also able to change the chemical makeup of the object.

Thus, he was able to help save Superboy and Supergirl from a deadly Kryptonite cloud. He also figured out how to tweak his abilities to throw off his enemies and to camouflage useless superheroes and others around him. But still, being able to change something's color is possible for pretty much anyone with a can of spray paint and a few spare minutes. This is yet another example of Marvel Comics partnering up with a big business to create a pretty lackluster superhero.

This time, they teamed up with the National Football League to useless superheroes -- what else -- a promotional series about a pun-loving, crime-fighting, ex-football player with super powers. Grayfield just so happens to interview an oddball chemist and sports fan who just so happens to have invented a practically indestructible football uniform. The series which Nicieza reportedly worked on just to get free New York Jets tickets was canceled rather quickly, but not before Grayfield created his own crime-fighting team.

Which le us to His power?

Dude could make loose change shoot out of his wrists. Born J. The camp was actually a front for a demented scientist who used a special device to give people superpowers. Part of the Legion of Substitute Heroesa group of moderately super-powered individuals who gathered together after being rejected from the Legion of Super-Heroes, Stone Boy has one of the most literal names on the list. He is an alien from the planet of Zwen, whose useless superheroes turn into stone in order to hibernate their way through their six-month-long winters.

On Earth, Stone Boy generally uses this ability in some pretty comical ways. He was originally unable to move or stay awake while in his stone state hence, his uselessnessso his teammates would throw him at enemies, drop him on their he or use him as a distraction.

Eventually, thanks to a bit of hypnotherapy, Stone Boy figured out useless superheroes to remain conscious and even move while using his power, but nevertheless, his skills are pretty underwhelming in a universe where mobile rock monsters and heroes are pretty much the norm. But hey, none of us can turn to stone, so maybe we shouldn't judge!

Carlton Useless superheroes Froyge, a. Hindsight Ladis a great guy to have around La Froyge had always wanted to be a superhero and decided to blackmail Speedball in order to force his way into the New Warriors. The one problem? Nevertheless, La Froyge was just happy to be a member of the team Distracted by all of the robot fighting, he absentmindedly drank some of the plastic, which essentially turned him into the human superball, Bouncing Boy!

As his name subtly implies, he quickly develops the power to inflate his body and turn into a sphere that could bounce off of anything without injury. Taine auditioned for the Legion of Super-Heroes multiple times before he was finally invited to the team. The fact that they even offered membership to a guy who only obtained his ridiculous powers after deliberately being bad at his job le us to believe that the Legion's pickings must have been slim Of course the world needed a superhero who literally ate his way out of his problems. When all of the food on Bismoll became inedible thanks to some pesky microbes, the Bismollians adapted by becoming able to eat and digest all matter.

Being able to eat any and everything might make for a good party trick, but the image of a Legionnaire stepping up to help the team by tying on a bib and tucking into a nice piece of, say, rebar, is laughable. Probably one of the most potentially offensive superheroes to ever exist, Rainbow Girl is a mood swing-prone superhero with the ability to harness the emotional spectrum Born Dori Aandraison, she hails from the planet Xolnar.

An aspiring actress, she wanted to become a member of the Legion of Super-Heroes in order to work her way into the acting world. What powers you ask? Why, the ability to make herself irresistible to people around her by emanating a field of light that basically looked like a rainbow She had an epiphany while writing her autobiography and realized she still wanted to pursue her dreams of superheroics, so she ended up ing the Legion of Substitute Heroes insteaddespite the fact that she felt they were not high-profile enough for her to meet her goals. So yeah, useless superheroes was basically the worst.

In keeping with the theme of super-literal superhero monikers, this DC Comics character gets his name from the fact that he can literally detach his own arm and use it to beat up villains. So basically, he has the power of almost every single action figure that has ever been produced.

This, as you might expect, begs the question W hat?! According to his creators, AFOB's powers are intentionally ridiculous, which makes sense, since he was both the first to try out for the Legion of Super-Heroes, and the first to be rejected.

Who are your favorite or, indeed, least favorite useless superheroes? Let us know in the comments! Share Share Tweet 0. Best Sitcoms Of The s, Ranked.

Useless superheroes

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The Most Worthless Superheroes Ever